Yesterday I took a spontaneous trip to the lake for Memorial Day weekend. By weekend I mean over night, and by spontaneous I mean that I called my mom and asked her if it was a good idea.
Ever since starting my business, leaving town for even the most minute amount of time to engage in a leisurely activity sounds outrageous. The mere thought of tucking away my work Monday through Friday would result in a definite end to this career. Like taking one moment to focus on something other than the task at hand would surely cause the Janga logs to crumble.
Sitting on the deck with my phone tucked away and wifi turned off relief rolled over me. Not because I didn’t fear missing something important, or that those few last assignments from the weekend were done. This feeling overtook because, for the first time in a long time it felt okay.
It felt okay to take a break from the work I love so much, and remember the other things I love too. And not only was it okay, but it felt so good. To talk with old friends, and laugh about things we did years ago. To remember what the water smelled like, and how the wind felt on my face. People always say “It’s the little things,” and for my that has never really been true. For me it is the big things. The “What can I do next?” things.
I would never say that my job does anything but bring my up, and bring my soul to life. But, we are a society of all or nothing, and at some point we have to find the balance between the two. We can’t run ourselves in the ground trying to be something, and we can’t let ourselves go because we fear becoming something either.
Life is a place of hope and fear. We make a choice everyday to show up or sit down. We just have to learn that some times sitting down is okay.